You've Got to Be Kidding me
by kousagi101
Summary: In which Stiles is kidnapped by a witch and cursed. A twist on Beauty and the Beast.


When he woke up, he didn't know where he was. It was dark, even when his eyes started adjusting to the room was still dimly lit, enough so that he could only see a silhouette, he squinted to try and focus in but the figure was already moving closer.

"Glad to see you've finally awaken Stiles."

And with that, the memories of the previous 24 hours came rushing back to him.

…..

It all started as a typical Friday. Stiles was researching a new threat in the pack's territory, no one had come into contact or even seen her, but they knew that it was someone with supernatural powers. He was content with reading the old books but Scott called him in to help the pack investigate the lead they had on their enemy in the forest.

"Dude you _know_ I hate field work," Stiles was complaining while they drove to meet the rest of the group.

Scott shrugged, apparently the threat was more serious than they assumed and they needed all the hands they could get. "Yeah we just use you for your jeep." He grinned at Stiles who punched him in the arm. "Ooh Stillinski that felt like a tap, it's time to start pumping some iron."

Stiles scoffed, "You and your stupid werewolf strength."

When they got there the rest of the pack had already assembled so Scott immediately transformed and ran off into the forest with the others. Stiles sighed and grabbed the book he had on sorcery and ran after them. Thinking back to it, it's all their fault for leaving the human by himself.

Stiles ran while taking note of the marks on the trees and simultaneously trying to flip through the pages of the book to find more information on their enemy when a blast of something hit him. Then it all went dark.

…..

The figure had come close enough now so that Stiles could now identify it as a she, and based on the marking on her arms and hands, he could tell she was a sorceress. She was tall, and had auburn hair, apart from that, she looked like a regular person. "So is this the part where you tell me your evil plan?" He asked.

She smiled and walked closer so that she was an inch away from his face, "Oh no, I have much better plans in store for you."

Stiles raised his eyebrows, "Let me guess, I'm to be your permanent sex slave?"

Chuckling, the sorceress put a hand on his shoulder, "Oh honey, by the time I'm done with you, no one's going to want you as their sex slave." She squeezed and Stiles world went dark again.

…..

When he woke up again he was in a different room and tied to a chair, dressed in a butlers uniform. He saw her standing in front of him, a slight smile on her face. "You need to stop doing that." He groaned, everything was sore and his head hurt.

"I'm sorry about that dear, it's just that I needed to make sure you wouldn't squirm during your fitting." She smiled back.

"So am I supposed to be your butler then? That's gonna be hard to do while I'm tied to this chair. I also don't even know who you are." Stiles retorted, getting a bit annoyed his friends hadn't found him by now. They had werewolf enhanced senses and they couldn't find him?

"Oh how rude of me. I am Bethana, leading member of the eighth trinity coven because my other two sisters were killed by the werewolves you associate yourself with. I was simply going to kill them off one by one, but after seeing you, I decided I wanted you instead as my prize. I've charmed the collar to prevent you from escape and it also cloaks this location from your pack." She said, all with a calm smile on her face.

It was then that Stlies noticed the leather collar around his neck. He frowned, "They're gonna find me, and when they do, get ready for some fucking revenge lady."

Bethana laughed and then leaned closer so that their faces nearly touched. "By the time I'm done with you Stiles, I'll have stripped you of your identity so you won't even want to go back."

He was her butler, and being the only other living thing in the house, he had to take care of all the cleaning and cooking in the manor he was confined to. Bethana warned him that if he were to make a mistake, he'd be punished. Stiles didn't really understand what she meant, until he'd mistakenly called her "Ms." instead of "My Lady." While serving her tea.

"Oh no Stiles, you are always to address me as "Lady Bethana or My lady." She had said as he put down her cup of tea. She looked him up and down for a brief moment before returning to her tea "I must've measured you wrong because your uniform looks a bit snug."

Stiles was about to reply when suddenly his body was tingling all over and the uniform _did_ feel snug. He was confused, but shrugged it off as apologized and went back to his duty. This wasn't the last time it happened though.

The next time he messed up had been when he dropped a vase while dusting the house. Bethana had walked over and looked at the pile, "Oh it seems you've made a mess. A pity, that vase was from the Ming dynasty." She'd said it so calmly it didn't even seem as though she was mad, but then she looked at Stiles again as he swept up the shards "It's good to know you're enjoying the food."

She walked away and again Stiles felt the tingling again. The shirt felt tighter and when he got up, the tightness didn't go away. When went to his room to change for bed, he looked in the mirror.

His face was fuller, and the abs he had so longly struggled to achieve were hidden under a thin layer of fat. It wasn't much, but noticeable. It was now that Stiles realized what she her game was, laying in the bed, he vowed he would personally rip her head off when he got saved from the pack.

A week later the pack still hadn't found him. Stiles hadn't made any more mistakes other than the first two, but somehow he was still gaining weight. Every day Bethana would make a small comment on his appearance as he was cleaning or cooking, but he didn't show any signs of discomfort and just kept on doing what he was supposed to. There were a couple times he was stupid enough to try and sneak out or cut off the collar, but the magical barrier prevented him from doing either. As he served her dinner one night, Bethana addressed him about the weight.

"Stiles your uniform is looking rather tight, are you sure you wouldn't like me to get you a new one?" She asked in a mock concerned tone.

Stiles smiled, he wouldn't let her have the pleasure of seeing him bothered by this. "Oh no my lady, I feel fine."

Bethana eyes flashed for a second, "Are you sure dear? it looks as though that button may burst at any secon-"

The button popped off before she could even finish. Stiles laughed it off, "Oh would you look at that, I guess I will be needing a new uniform. Thank you M'lady for being so caring." He never showed her his discomfort. It was at night when he would inspect the damage in the full length mirror she had kindly put in his room. He had a stomach now, and it wasn't a hard beer gut that only stuck out. It was soft and jiggly and when he sat it made rolls on his stomach. He was developing a slight double chin and the tone in his arms had been lost midway through the week. There was a knock on the door and before he could cover up Bethana walked in with the new uniform.

"I have your new uniform, though I suggest you start thinking more about what you eat, or you'll be growing out of this one in soon time as well." She smiled, patting his stomach.

Stiles forced a smile, "How kind of you to think of me M'lady."

It was another week before he needed another new uniform. He had tried to counter her curse by exercising but it was to no avail. He was running in the courtyard when she came out to join him.

They were running side by side until she made another comment. "Do keep up Stiles, I'm barely jogging." And suddenly he was slower, his breathing was heavier, and by the time they reached the half mile point his face was flushed and he was gasping for air. Bethana smiled walking toward him, "With all the exercise you do I wonder why you aren't in better shape. I suggest laying off the sweets honey, your face is starting to take the toll." And like that, Stiles suddenly had an oily face covered blemishes.

Stiles only smiled, "I promise to do better My Lady."

Bethana's eyes flashed, no matter her snide comments, Stiles just shrugged it off with a smile, it wasn't what she wanted. She wanted him to suffer and visibly show it.

That night after dinner, she sat him down in a chair. "Look at you," she spat, walking around him and looking over her handiwork on his body. "Have you no cares about how you look?"

Stiles smiled, "No M'lady"

She glared at him, "Your hair is greasy, your face is oily, not to mention all the weight you've gained. At least 40 pounds." She jabbed her finger into his stomach and it sank into the flesh. "You couldn't help your friends before, you'll be even more useless now. You aren't even a pretty face anymore." She snapped her fingers and a new set of clothes appeared on Stiles, the ones Stiles had been wearing before he'd been captured. "Look at that, they look painted on."

Painted indeed, the shirt was tight and hugged every new curve. It accentuated the weight he had gained not only in his stomach, but the chest as well, as his once flat chest now held fat and his pecs were now man boobs. Bethana made him get up and she poked and prodded his new fat. When he was finally dismissed, it took all he had in him not to punch her in the face.

Inspecting the damage that night, Stiles ultimately decide that he'd need to outsmart her if he was going to escape while he could still walk. The next week and 20 pounds later, Stiles gave in to what she wanted.

"Lady Bethana, I'm terribly sorry but would you mind getting me a new uniform again? Mine's a bit tight."

She smiled, "Of course dear, although it doesn't look all that tight yet."

"Oh really?" He grabbed his stomach for emphasis, "I've had to suck in to button my pants, I'm afraid I'm unseemly in this current uniform."

Bethana set down her tea, "Well I suppose you're right." She walked over to inspect his uniform, unbuttoning his shirt, Stiles stomach spilled out over his waistband. "It looks like I can pinch an inch, or in this case, more like five."

Stiles made a shocked face, "Oh no, you really think I've put on that much?" He looked down at his stomach concerned.

Bethana was visibly delighted "Well you definitely aren't just chubby anymore dear, have you really not noticed?"

"I could have sworn it was just a couple pounds, is it really that bad?"

"Stiles dear, I think we should find a scale."

In the bathroom, Stiles stepped on the glass scale, as the numbers climbed up he looked at Bethana, "Would you mind reading it? My stomach's in the way of the numbers." He lied.

She read the number slowly, two hundred and forty three pounds. That was 15 pounds higher than what the scale actually said, but Stiles nodded looking sad. " That's almost a hundred pounds!" He said in mock disbelief. He hopped off the scale, his stomach jiggling as he did so. "Look at me, I'm so fat everything jiggles. I think even my neck's gotten fatter." He slapped his stomach.

Bethana smirked, "Well big boy, I did tell you to lay off the food. Now look at where you've gotten." She took his stomach and held it in her hands, squeezing hard. "You're on the verge of a triple chin now, it's no wonder your collar feels tight, it's still adjusted to your neck size when you came to me."

Stiles laughed, "Yeah you're right, I can't believe my neck was ever that small, it looks as though you wouldn't even be able to fit in it."

An eyebrow raised, "What did you say?" Bethana asked.

"I'm just surprised my neck was ever that small, I mean I thought you were skinny but it looks as though it wouldn't even fit you." Stiles said steadily, egging her on.

She bought it, "Of course it fits," she said, slipping it on, and like that she was unable to take it off. Stiles tackled her and the force of his weight knocked her out. When she woke up, she was bound hands and legs, tied to a chair. "It seems the apprentice has outgrown the master." She said sarcastically. "My god you've gotten fat."

Stiles had found a larger shirt and was standing in front of her when she said that, he felt her words as the shirt went from baggy to form fitting. "Fix this." He said, gesturing to his body.

She laughed, "Oh Stiles dear, it's a shame I was only in phase two of my plan. You see, I was planning on making you so unrecognizable, to the extent of taking your name, that even the scent you had on you would be lost.

His hands made fists, "Stop telling me your evil plans with me and give me the cure."

She smirked, "Well, that was the foolproof part. The only way to counter this curse is with a kiss of true romantic love. And with the way you look now, it'll be rare if you find that. But by the time I was done with you, you'd forget you were ever Stiles."

"You've _got_ to be kidding me." Stiles groaned, how cliche. He looked through her books and began grabbing the potions on her shelf, none of them were right, and in his frustration, he didn't notice she had began glowing.

"My work here is done Stiles dear. I sense your pack so I shall now be returning to my rightful place with my sisters." She laughed and before he could even turn, there was an explosion and he flew back into the wall, books fell on him and he could hear the familiar voices of Scott and the rest of them before he blacked out.

...

When Stiles woke up, he was in an unfamiliar bed. He began to panic, thinking he was still trapped, but as his vision cleared he began to recognize the room. He looked around and realized it was Derek's room. He and Derek weren't the best of friends, why wouldn't he be with Scott or his own home? Before he could give it anymore thought, Derek walked into the room staring at Stiles looking pissed off, ' _as usual'_ Stiles though. He was about to thank Derek before Derek cut him off.

"Who are you?" He asked in a dangerously low voice.

Stiles' stomach dropped, "What?"

Derek walked closer, his eyes cold. "I found you buried underneath a pile of books with a trace of my friends scent on you." He grabbed the collar of Stiles' shirt "I don't know who you are, but you're going to tell me where he is and where that bitch sorceress went."

Stiles tried pushing himself away but of course Derek's stupid werewolf strength made that impossible. "Derek this better be some sick joke you can't pull off, it's me, Stiles. You're a sourwolf that doesn't enjoy anyone's company. Your family died in a fire, Kate Argent turned you into a 15 year old, we were fucking paralyzed next to each other dude!"

Derek squinted, and looked at Stiles as if he was staring into his soul. Stiles felt uncomfortable under his gaze. He leaned in close, his nose touching Stiles' chest and inhaled deep. Then he looked up and stared into Stiles' eyes. It was a full minute until Stiles cleared his throat uncomfortably. Derek leaned back and sat in the chair beside the bed. "Well shit, it really is you."

Stiles got out of the bed and took a deep breath. "I need a mirror."

Derek looked over, and Stiles could have sworn he saw a look of sympathy for a brief moment. "You're not going to like it."

"I don't care I just need to see."

The witch had done some major damage, he had known that, he just didn't know to what extent. Stiles swallowed as he looked at his reflection, he couldn't blame Derek for not recognizing him, he really wasn't the same person at all. He was wearing a permanent fat suit, and even standing, his stomach had rolls. His shirt stretched tight across his stomach and it hung over his waistband, a generous muffin top at his sides. His pecs had turned more into tits, which sagged and nearly sat atop his stomach. His face was chubby and round with blemishes, sporting a near triple chin. His hair was greasy and his neck was bruised purple from the collar. The fatness of his cheeks had pushed up and caused his eyes to become naturally slitted. Stiles sighed, "Well I guess I'm screwed then."

"No you aren't, you'll just research the cure and it'll be fine." Derek said nonchalantly.

Stiles turned to him, "No I can't, you don't understand."

Derek got up, "No I do understand, this isn't our first time with the supernatural, we'll find a cure and then this whole debacle will be over."

Stiles grit his teeth, "No we won't. There's only one cure and it won't work."

Derek shook his head, "The pack's already out looking for the sorceress, we'll find her and she'll make you normal again, so stop whining it's only going to be for a couple days."

"The witch is dead." Stiles said very slowly, his voice wavering "And she _told_ me the cure right before she died, and I won't be able to do anything about this body, at least not for a long while."

"What are you talking about?" Derek asked, getting visibly annoyed. "If you know the solution to this little problem then why don't you just do it?"

 _the only way to break it is true loves kiss_ , and trust me. No one was interested in me before, and no one is going to be interested now." He crumpled on the floor, tears filling his eyes, " _it was a foolproof plan_."

Derek didn't say anything for a long while, and then he excused himself to go gather the pack. When they came back, Stiles had gotten back up and his eyes were wiped dry. He could see the looks of disbelief that he was the same guy, the same Stiles. He explained to them what had happened and the witch's only cure. Again there was an awkward pause as they realized it was a near impossible cure. But Scott was the first to break the silence. "We're gonna do this, we'll make you lovable even if you have a little extra." He patted Stiles' back which quickly turned into a hug.

Stiles scoffed "You think it's gonna work? Someone's gonna love a fatass like me?"

Scott smiled "Of course man, and we're not gonna stop until we find someone or another way to cure this thing."

 ** _Two Years Later_**

An alarm clock blared the radio and Stiles groaned, slapping the clock to the ground. He heaved himself to sit up and his feet hit the floor with a thud. As he walked to the bathroom his body jiggled, a feeling he had grown familiar with. He looked into the mirror at a face that was not his, but had become all too familiar. "Good morning beautiful" he sighed warily as he washed his face and got ready for the day.

...

It had been hard at first, adjusting to his new body, and not just physically. Telling his father was the easiest. He told him the truth and his father was grateful his son was still alive. They had tests done at the hospital to check for any signs of heart disease but he was still healthy as a ever. It was at school, where Stiles had to endure the stares of his classmates and snide insults for a month before graduation rolled around and he left that place forever. He had never realized how shallow people were. Even walking through the streets he'd notice the stares and grimaces of people passing by. Comments like "Fatass" and "Lose some weight" were compliments to him compared to other things he'd heard.

His friends tried to support him, but by the end, it was mainly Scott, Lydia, Derek, and Allison that stuck around. It wasn't like the others had stopped being friends with him, they all still hung out as a big group, but their personal connections just kind of drifted away over time. Stiles didn't mind, growing up and going to college was part of that. A majority of them did attend the same university however, Berkley, where Stiles decided to major in Forensic science. At Berkley, he could start anew, he wouldn't be Stiles 'the once-attractive-now-ugly' Stillinski. He'd be Stiles 'the always had been fat and deals with it' he pretended like he had lived with it all his life, and embracing that helped Stiles feel less self conscious.

His relationship with Derek was still a mystery. He wasn't sure if he could call him a good friend, but they were closer, that Stiles knew. A week after the incident Stiles began to run the trails in the state forest, perhaps subconsciously hoping he could lose the weight with enough determination. He ran early in the morning or later in the afternoon when the hikers were gone. A couple days went by and he bumped into Derek who also ran the trails. At first Stiles tried to run after him and try talking to him, "Why are you up so early? Do you know the best trails? Is this how you get that lumberjack musk scent?" Derek ignored him of course, but after that Stiles still managed to find him and he'd continue his endless strand of questions or comments. Weeks later and still not a single ounce had shed from Stiles' body, not with his exercise or limited diet of greens and lean meats, however he decided to continue running because now it served as a stress reliever. When Stiles left for school, there was a local state forest he ran there, however the absence of Derek had left him strangely lonely.

That was until Derek enrolled in Berkley to pursue the education he had never gotten. He was a foreign language major, and in a different year, so Stiles didn't see much of him personally, but he still was seen hanging out with the group occasionally. Sure enough though, Stiles soon found Derek running the same trails he was on, and the game of trying to get Derek to talk continued. It was a week before the question, one that had been bugging Stiles for a while, came into play.

"When you found me, what did you mean when you said I only had a trace of my scent?"

Derek stopped running so abruptly that Stiles knocked into him and fell over. "Why do you want to know?" he asked gruffly.

Stiles got up, "I was just wondering what that meant, what I smelled like and what I smell like now. I mean, for you to not even know it was my scent.." he trailed off not knowing what else to say.

Derek was frowning, as though someone had asked him to deliver a baby. He let out a sigh when Stiles showed he wouldn't let it go. "I said what I meant. You had a scent before, a distinct scent. But when I found you, that scent was nearly gone. It was the same as if you had just touched someone's arm and they had a small bit of what you had left behind." He closed his eyes, " A person's scent is what makes up their identity, it cannot be copied and it stays with them after death. Apart from that small trace of your scent, I couldn't smell anything, no new scent. You smell of nothing, you are no one."

Stiles bit his lip and furled his eyebrows for a second, "Well that sucks." and then he started back up jogging.

Derek followed after him. "Are you angry that you don't have a scent?"

"Why would I be? I see this as a way to reinvent myself." Stiles said casually, picking up the speed.

"But she stole your life from you."

"Actually I'm still living."

"Yes but not in your own skin." Derek sped up to join Stiles.

"That's gross don't say it like that."

"Why don't you care about this?"

Stiles stopped and turned around, his eyes were red and it looked as though he was on the verge of tears. "You really think I don't _care_?" He spat. "Do you know the looks I get? The comments? 5 months ago I could see my feet and fit inside my jeep. Now I can't even fit on a bed they have in the dorms. Not to mention the only way I could ever _cure_ this is the only thing I won't get."

Derek interrupted him before he could go on, "Stiles, it's not the worst thing. You could have been dead. And it's not as if you'll never be with someone you love, Scott is always on the lookout for you."

"Yeah but it's not like I have a 6 pack and a pretty face like you" Stiles grumbled before realizing what he'd said, "guys" he quickly said, his face growing red "Not a pretty face like you _guys_."

Before Derek could say anything else, Stiles started jogging again and he followed. It was after that day, Derek and Stiles began to talk a little bit more during there runs and Derek was confused about his feelings toward the annoying human.

...

Stiles didn't really know when being around Derek becomes the highlight of his days, or why he enjoyed talking to him so much. He guessed it was because Derek also doubled as a therapist in a way. Stiles could talk and talk about his feelings or his problems and Derek would just nod.

It was after a run on a particularly hot day that Stiles built up the courage to invite him to actually hang out. Derek was walking to his car when Stiles ran after him, "Hey, do you wanna grab lunch or something?" he asked, fiddling with his shirt hem.

Derek looked at him for what felt like an hour but was in reality probably only 10 seconds. Stiles swallowed uncomfortably and broke Derek's gaze by looking at his shoes intensely. 'This was a stupid idea, Derek wouldn't want to be seen with me in public, he's probably got plans.'

"Sure why not"

"Really?" Stiles head snapped up.

Derek shrugged, "Yeah, it's a hot day and we've been running for an hour."

When they got to the cafe, Stiles remembered that he was still in his running clothes. His t-shirt was soaked with sweat and clinging to his body so that it hugged his stomach and emphasized the fat. He could feel the stares of the people and when he got his food he swear he saw the cashier snicker when he ordered curly fries with his salad. The only free table was in the middle of the cafe, surrounded by other people. Stiles had to suck in and maneuver past the maze to even get to his seat.

Derek watched him with interest during the process. "Interesting combination of fries and a salad." He noted as he ate his own sandwich.

Stiles shrugged, "I ate like this before the curse because my dad was at risk for heart disease so I always made us healthier stuff. Eating salad has become a habit for me but it's also obvious that nothing I do will help and I love these curly fries, so I'm not going to give up my eating habits just because I'm fat now."

Derek was gong to answer when he noticed some rather loud whispers from the tables around him. A pair girls at the table next to him, most likely in high school, were discussing Stiles and Derek's relationship rather loudly.

"Do you think he's his boyfriend?" One of them asked the other.

"Pfft no, most likely he's a personal trainer, I mean look at how sweaty that guy is, didn't he even have the decency to change?"

"What's the point of the salad if he's eating curly fries? No wonder he's huge, poor guy probably has no willpower."

She nodded sympathetically. "I'm surprised the trainer hasn't said anything yet, the calorie count in those things are the highest.

They continued on making comments about Stiles' weight and Derek's availability. Derek huffed loudly and looked at Stiles who was eating his curly fries as if they were the only food he'd seen in months. "Doesn't this bother you?"

Stiles looked up from the food, it was the second time Derek had asked him a question like that. He shrugged, "I mean, everyone has a right to freedom of speech and all that jazz. Some people think it, others say it out loud." He continued to shove curly fries into his mouth, "If I let it bother me then there's no way I'll live my life happy."

Derek looked at him, how could someone be so okay with that? It was amazing. He took a sip of his water, "So how are classes?" he asked.

Stiles eyes lit up as he started to explain his Forensics 101 class and Derek listened intently, almost smiling.

…

Stiles didn't have a poor social life after the curse. He still went out to parties with Scott and the gang and he still had fun. But going to parties in his new body got annoying. Most house parties were packed tight and being a bigger guy, he usually found the masses of sweaty bodies grinding against each other annoying. He also wasn't lucky enough to pick up anyone at these parties. Most girls would talk to him to get to his hotter friends like Scott or Isaac. So needless to say, while Stiles loved his friends, he took to spending his weekend nights at home on the couch.

It was one Sunday night as Stiles, Scott, and Isaac were eating dinner when Scott brought up Derek. "So Derek's lease on his apartment runs out and he needs a new place to stay, I figured he could move in here."

As it turned out, Stiles and Scott shared an apartment with Isaac and another guy after their first year. It was a nice place and they each got their own rooms. About a month into living their, the other guy, Will, had moved out. The room had been empty for a couple months and so by the next Thursday, Derek had moved into a room and became the 4th roommate.

The following Friday evening, Isaac and Scott bid their farewells as they embarked to a club and Stiles got himself comfortable on the couch with a slice of pizza. He had turned off all the lights and was getting ready to watch a movie.

"You aren't going out?"

Stiles nearly dropped his plate, Derek was sitting in the armchair next to him, a book in his hands. "Jesus, why are you reading in the dark?"

Derek raised his eyebrows, "Because you just turned them all off."

Stiles began to start the movie, "Well sorry, I didn't see you since you like to skulk in the shadows all the time."

Derek sat on the couch next to Stiles, "So why aren't you going out?"

Stiles pressed play, "Oh you know" he said dismissively, "It's just always crowded and it's better in 's also hard for an ugly fat guy to get lucky at parties" he said the last part jokingly.

Derek didn't say anything and instead turned his attention to the movie, "So what movie is this?"

Stiles looked at Derek, his eyes wide, "Seriously dude? You don't know The Goonies?" he launched into a heated synopsis of the film and Derek listened, amused. And after that, Stiles found a new friend to watch his 80s movies with on Friday evenings.

...

It wasn't like no one had kissed him. When Stiles first got the stupid curse, everyone had graciously stepped up to the plate and took turns kissing Stiles. Of course some of those were more willing than others, but they all still did it. Lydia was kind enough to offer first, and even though Stiles saw her nose wrinkle when she leaned in, he had hoped it was her. Surprisingly, and not so surprisingly, it wasn't. When they had went down the line of girls, Danny generously offered and after that, a few of the other guys tried too. Even Jackson tried, however Stiles knew it felt wrong before Jackson had even put his lips on his. The kindest was Scott. He and Scott were hanging out one day, and Scott claimed that perhaps the love he felt for Stiles would be romantic, but when it didn't work it turned out to be just pure brotherly love, which Stiles didn't mind, Scott was his best friend in the world and he wouldn't change that.

….

Stiles was just getting out of his last class of the day, Criminal Psychology, when he received a text from Scott.

 _'_ _Hey dude, ready for tonight?'_

Stiles texted back a quick response of _'On my way to get the stuff now!_ ' and then hopped on his bike. Since the campus at Berkley was so big and gas prices were crazy, Stiles left the jeep at the apartment and rode his bike around the campus mostly. Everything in the area was so accessible already though so not having a car wasn't awful. He was meeting Derek to go buy alcohol for the Halloween party he and Scott were hosting tonight at their apartment. Stiles loved every part of the holiday. Dressing up and getting free candy was awesome, and along with that, nearly everyone was in a good mood. He met up with Derek and hopped into Derek's car to the local liquor store.

There were ways in which Derek had changed, and ways in which he had not. Derek was still quiet, and nothing was going to change that. But his personality, which used to come off as an asshole, was now increasingly more pleasant to be around. Sure Derek still made sarcastic comments, but somehow they were less threatening than before and Stiles could joke around him now without the fear of being punched afterward.

In the car, the song YMCA had just come on and Stiles had turned up the radio and started bobbing his head and dancing like an idiot when suddenly the craziest thing happened, Derek chuckled. "You like that huh?" Stiles shouted over the music, "it's because I'm so fun and jiggly." He started shimmying and true to his word, everything was indeed jiggly. It was such a funny sight to Derek because Stiles had just looked so determined to make it jiggle. "It's like I'm Chunk from the Goonies doing the truffle shuffle, which you understand now because I made you watch it." He said when the song died down, smiling ear to ear.

Derek laughed, a real laugh, which made Stiles stomach jump. "If you're Chunk then who's Scott?"

Stiles pretended to think, "Hmm, I'd say Mikey, since he's all about the inhaler."

"You do realize that he hasn't needed his inhaler since I bit him right?"

Stiles mock frowned, "You're right, in that case he's probably Mouth since Mouth is also a Latino."

Derek shook his head, smiling, "You're ridiculous, and possibly racist. But if you're Chunk then does that mean I'm Sloth?"

Stiles sat up, "Why would you say you're Sloth?"

Derek shrugged, "Well because Sloth and Chunk are friends and always together, _and_ just like you, Chunk was scared at Sloth because he was a monster"

Stiles scoffed, "First of all, you aren't a monster, you are a werewolf. And also I was totally not scared of you when we first met, I just thought you were too pale. You're probably more of a Brand though, since he's all into his 6-pack and always looking after the Goonies."

Derek looked at him, "Really you think I'm Brand?"

"You could be Brand, I mean you guys both have the eyebrows."

Derek rolled his eyes, " _Everyone_ has eyebrows dumbass. And also who even names their kid Brand?"

They had reached their destination and Stiles jumped out, "Well obviously it's short for Brandon."

"Huh, I didn't think about that."

"Well obviously, that's why I'm the brain and you're the brawn of this duo."

"So we're a duo now?" Derek asked as they entered the store.

Stiles almost blushed. "Well no but I was just using the word as an example, don't take everything so literally sour wolf." He changed the subject by picking up the first bottle he saw, "so I'm thinking we get this tequila along with- Oo! That blue stuff looks good."

Derek followed, amused, as Stiles began running from aisle to aisle grabbing different colored alcohols, this was going to be a fun party.

…

Of course no one showed up to the party on time, not like there had been an actual set time it started. The whole gang had returned, and man, there were a lot of couples. Allison and Scott had gotten back together, Jackson and Lydia of course were still head over heels in love, and even Danny had brought Ethan. The costumes however were on point this year, if Stiles had to say so himself. He himself was dressed as Tom Cruise from Risky Business, complete with the button down and boxer shorts, the only thing he was missing was the glasses, but those would have looked stupid anyway. He was getting the jungle juice ready when Derek had come over.

"Hey" Derek said, almost shyly. Derek had chosen to be Indiana Jones and Stiles had to admit the scruff on Derek's face fit perfectly, along with the jacket and pants. Derek had something in his hands, "I got something for you since Halloween is your favorite holiday."

Stiles eyes nearly bulged, "Really dude? You didn't have to do that for me."

Derek shrugged, handing the item to Stiles "It was no big deal."

Stiles looked at the object, a glasses case. He opened it up to find a pair of Ray Bans identical to the kind from Risky Business, he looked up at Derek. "What? This is awesome! Derek thank you so much, but how much was this?" He put them on and flashed a smile.

"I had them laying around in my house," Derek lied, even though he had ordered them online weeks ago. "So you like them?"

Stiles opened his mouth to reply but at that moment yells or 'Trick or treat' were heard from the doorway and the party guests had arrived.

….

Of course the party had blown up, but it didn't really matter. Stiles was having a fun time dancing with his friends, even Jackson who had only made one mean remark.

"Still a fatass virgin I see Stilinski." He shouted over the music, earning a punch in the arm from Lydia.

"Still compensating for your tiny penis I see Whittemore." Stiles yelled back. He made his way over to the snack table and for a refill. Stiles had only had a couple shots but he was already feeling buzzed. Unfortunately, his alcohol tolerance had not gone up along with his weight. He was shoving the curly fries they had set out into his mouth when two girls came over.

"So what's the deal with you?" One of them asked.

Stiles mentally groaned. They were the type of freshman girls that went to parties that they heard about in hopes of hot guys and free alcohol. He swallowed his food, "What do you mean my deal?"

"You know, how is it possible that you're friends with such beautiful people when you look like that?" She replied, giving him the one up. "I mean, you live with the two of the hottest sophomores on campus and another very attractive junior. Do you do all their homework for them in exchange for their friendship?"

The other girl interjected, "Or did they lose a bet and now they have to hang out with you or else you'll kill them?"

Stiles scoffed, "what so just because I'm fat I can't have friends? And they weren't always perfect you know. Scott had asthma."

The first girl shook her head, "I just don't get it. I mean why don't you try and take care of yourself at least? You'd be decent if you lost weight."

Stiles walked away before she could say anything else and found Derek on the couch. "Hey Derek, mind if I join you?"

Derek looked up, "Yeah no problem. Is anything wrong?"

Stiles shook his head, "Nah, just some freshman questioning why I'm part of the group."

"Why? Did you explain because you are a key asses of our friend group?" Derek asked.

Stiles looked over, "No idiot, take a wild guess." He gestured to his body.

Derek opened his mouth to say something and stopped, thought for a second, and opened it again. "You know what I just realized? You're Chunk"

"Why thank you for being the 20th person tonight reminding me why I'm still a virgin." Stiles said sarcastically.

Derek's eyes raked over Stiles' body for a brief moment and Stiles blushed. "No Stiles, from the Goonies. You _are_ Chunk because you always look out for everyone and you're always there for them. Sure you may be a klutz and a little ADD and all over the place, but that's why everyone love Chunk even when he always gets left behind. But you know what, I'm Sloth, and Sloth was always there for Chunk and they cared about each other. Just the way I care about you now. And I'm not going to let this stupid curse change the way you'll live your life."

And suddenly Derek's lips were on Stiles before he could reply and time stopped for a brief moment. Stiles closed his eyes and he swore he could see the fireworks. When Derek pulled back and Stiles opened his eyes, he saw that Derek's expression showed surprise and then disappointment.

Stiles didn't even need an explanation. "It didn't work did it?" He said in nearly a whisper.

"Stiles, I-"

Stiles got up quickly, his face flushing, "It's never going to work because attraction is a main part of love and it's never gonna happen while I look like this."

Derek got up, "Stiles, I don't care about what you look like, I know how I feel about you and I want to be with you. You're the first thing I think of in the morning and the last thing I think of at night. I knew you before the curse and in my eyes nothing has changed."

Stiles shook his head and started walking away, "It's not going to work Derek, you're confusing this. It's not love, this is friendship, this is brotherly love. I know it's not my time yet, maybe eventually I'll find someone and change back, but right now? Not going to happen, and I've accepted that. Young people are just so shallow, and who can blame them? I'll wait till they've all caught up to me and then I'll swoop in and find someone equally attractive that I can fall in love with."

Derek grabbed his arm, "Stiles why are you running away? I know I'm not mistaking this feeling, I've felt love before and I never thought I would feel this way about anyone ever again."

Stiles turned around and Derek's heart stopped as he saw the tears streaming down his face, "Why would you do this to yourself Derek? You're perfect, and gave you _seen_ me? Do you know the ridicule you'd go through? How many people would ask if I was some charity case or some bet because that's the only reason you'd be with me." He started unbuttoning his shirt "because this," the final button was undone and he gestured to the mound of flesh that rolled out over the waistband of his boxers. "Is what you're going to deal with." He slapped it and the noise was painful and hollow. He swore he heard one of the freshman girls say 'ew' but Stiles was walking away from Derek before Derek could answer. "And I had hoped it was you." He said to himself.

….

Stiles ran upstairs, kicked out the couple about to have sex in his bedroom, and locked the door. He laid on his bed and buried his face in his pillow letting the sobs come out, of all the pent up anger and frustration over the years of being stuck in a permanent fat suit, and the looks, and the taunts, and how he would never be able to be with his true love because he had just yelled at him downstairs and probably blown his chance. He cried himself to sleep and let his memories take him.

 _A week after living with the curse, Stiles had woken up in the middle of the night sweating. He had had another nightmare of the witch and being trapped again. He splashed cold water into his face and proceeded to throw up. He couldn't fall back asleep so he spent the rest of the night doing exercises. This proceeded to happen over the next few days, and it was Derek who first noticed._

 _"_ _What's wrong?" Derek had asked, pulling Stiles aside one night._

 _Stiles had avoided Derek's eyes, "Nothing."_

 _"_ _Bullshit, is it the nightmares?"_

 _"_ _How did you know that?"_

 _Derek looked at him, "I can smell the fear on you. I can also tell you haven't slept in days, and I don't even need my werewolf senses for that."_

 _Stiles looked at him, his eyes on the verge of tears, "then what do I do Derek? Do you know how terrified I am?"_

 _Derek hadn't replied. But Deaton give him a sleeping powder the next day that let him sleep dreamless dreams until he felt better. When Stiles asked how Deaton knew, he replied, "Derek was worried and came to me asking if I had anything."_

 _And that was the first act of kindness Stiles had received since he'd received the curse._

Stiles woke up an hour later and looked at the clock, it was only 11:30 and he could still hear the party raging on downstairs, but he had a massive headache and he didn't have any water in his room. He made his way bleary eyed down to the kitchen, which locked out to the party goers, and grabbed a jug of water and started drinking it when a voice interrupted.

"Uh hey dude, just so you know the kitchen is off limits. I don't know how you got in here but this is a residents only area." He hadn't heard Scott come in.

Stiles sighed and turned around, "I love the joke Scott but I'm pretty sure I'm the only 300 pound Tom Cruise at this party." He was met with Scott's wide eyes that seemed alarmed.

For a moment everything had gone quiet, but then a large goofy grin broke onto Scott's face and suddenly Stiles was pulled into a tight hug, "Dude! I can put my arms around you again! I've missed you so much"

Stiles blinked in confusion, "Scott what are you talking about…" He trailed off as Scott's words hit him, and he could feel Scott's arms wrapped, fully, around Stiles' body. "Mirror." He said quietly.

Scott released the hug, "Huh?"

Stiles touched his face, it didn't feel oily. "MIRROR."

Scott grabbed his hand and brought him to the full length mirror in the bathroom. "Wait you didn't realized you changed back?" He laughed. "So who's the lucky lady or lad?"

Stiles looked at himself and he knew if this was a dream he didn't want to wake up. He was him again. His hair had grown out, for some reason it hadn't grown during the curse but stayed shaved so he never bothered to cut it, but apparently his body remembered. His hair was longer, but nice. The running had apparently helped, as Stiles now had a bit of tone to muscles that didn't once exist. He was him again and he wanted to laugh and jump with joy, but then he remembered. "Derek,' he whispered, he touched his fingers to his lips.

"Wait did you just say Derek?" Scott asked.

"Sorry Scotty boy, no time to explain, but I must thank you for being the best friend in the world!" Stiles gave Scott a quick peck on the cheek and then ran out into the party. He searched the crowd for Derek but saw everyone but him instead. The pack greeted him the same way as Scott, with surprise and then hugs, and then a question of who was the one to kiss him. Stiles moved on, reaching the couch Derek had been residing, however it had been taken over by a new couple sucking their faces off each other. He was trying to think about where Derek had been when his thoughts were interrupted.

"Hey there." It was one of the freshman girls from earlier.

"Hi." Stiles said before trying to move past her.

"I didn't see you here earlier, have we met before?" She asked, her hand touching his bicep. "I'm sure I would have remembered someone like you."

Stiles stopped and turned around, "as a matter of fact we have met. You had asked me earlier how someone as ugly as me could be in a group of people as attractive as my friends. But you know why I'm in that group? It's because they _love_ me, and you know what else? I live here and I can kick you out, so suck on that you slut." He brought her and her friend to the front door.

"But this doesn't even make sense" One of the girls said as as he threw them out.

"Oh it does but your brains are probably too small to comprehend that." He mock frowned and then shut the door in their faces. Sure he didn't believe in revenge, but that felt good.

Stiles searched all around the house, and then tried Derek's bedroom. He was about to open the door when he heard a girl's voice and a guy, and whatever they were saying or doing, sounded a lot like sex. Stiles' heart dropped and turned around, bumping right into Derek.

"Watch where you're going idiot" Derek said, skulking past him.

"I wouldn't go in there if I were you." Stiles shouted after him.

He turned around ready to say something but froze when he saw the speaker the voice was attached to.

Stiles smiled weakly, "Hey Der, I might have overreacted earlier.."

Derek grinned, "You think?"

"Do you want to go up to my room where people aren't defiling my bed?" Stiles joked.

"I'd love that."


End file.
